Let it freaking go

Yesterday I had an appointment with a new neurologist.

Now, before I write about my TWO HOUR wasted appointment, let me preface this by saying, “NO ONE TOLD ME THIS DOCTOR WAS ONLY SUBBING FOR ONE WEEK.”  I would not have wasted his time, OR MINE, by seeing him yesterday if anyone had told me this.  My time is valuable, whether you think it is or isn’t.

But, no.  Does anything medical run smoothly in my life?  Again, no.

Does most anyone do their jobs at the clinics I attend?  (Well, some do; I will say this.)

I am still so mad about yesterday and it’s been a whole 24 hours since it happened.

So, I am waiting in the exam room and in walks this doctor.  Dr. A?  I don’t even remember his name.  Seriously.  He sits in front of me and starts to ask me a few questions.  I can tell by his questions that he didn’t look at my records.  He continues to ask some basic headache questions, and I interrupt him.  “I have 2 brain tumors.”  And, he kind of reels back, in shock.  I told him I have “Lhermitte-duclos disease”.

HIM:  “What?”

ME:  “I don’t know if I pronounced it properly.  I’ll say it again.  Lhermitte-duclos disease.”

HIM:  “Is that like Cowden Syndrome?”

Oh my freaking gosh.  I cannot.  Seriously.  I freaking CANNOT.  I don’t care if you’ve never heard of it.  I don’t care if you never saw it in your training.  I am an established patient at this clinic.  YOU LOOK AT MY FREAKING RECORDS BEFORE YOU SIT DOWN WITH ME.

I wanted to clobber him.

He then asks about my symptoms: I tell him about the headaches, the dizziness, my hyper-sensitive hearing, my decrease in my fine-motor skills, etc.  And, we go through them one by one.  He’s firing questions at me, and I literally feel like I am before a firing squad.  I have NEVER experienced anything like this before.  And, trust me.  I have been around the block.  I have seen many, many, doctors.  This one takes the damn cake.

When he’s finally finished barraging me with questions, the first thing he says to me is, “You have migraines.”  My response, “No duh.”

Well, not really.  But, I wish it had been.

I wish I would have said, “Do you mean migraines as in something different from headaches post-craniotomy?”

Then he goes on and on about changing my meds, that I have carpal tunnel syndrome, mindfulness, and all this other crap.  I was expected to have a STAT EMG  in like 2 weeks.  But guess what?  I have a medical appointment already.  And, I cannot change that appointment because it will be weeks before I can be seen there again.  You know how THIS clinic thinks they are GOD and all revolves around them?  Well, guess what.  Every other clinic I go to think the same thing.  And I have learned that once an appointment is set, it’s set.  I cannot change the appointment I have previously scheduled.  This decision of mine DID NOT go over well here.  But, sorry Felicia.  What do you expect me to do?  I will not sacrifice the rest of my medical status for you.  Period.

I would totally be on board with all of this.  But, here’s the kicker:  He wants all these changes but then I HAVE NO NEUROLOGIST AFTER HIM TO FOLLOW UP WITH!  What if I have withdrawals coming off the Topamax?  What if I can’t tolerate the new meds?  WHAT KIND OF DOCTOR makes these HUGE changes and then would hang me out to dry?  This office hopes to get a new neurologist sometime in September.

And you know what?  I hope so, too.



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