I have had a rough few days. Not sure why; not sure what triggers them. I have to accept the bad days, along with the good.
So, I had my brain scan a few Fridays ago. Saw the neurosurgeon the following Friday. Stable. Stable. Stable. In fact, the radiologist said “Grossly stable.” GREAT NEWS! If there hasn’t been any growth in 5 years, I hope that the next 5 years will be the same, you know?
Although I struggle with
wanting needing to know everything about the brain tumors. Has there been minimal growth? MRI’s aren’t 100% accurate. So, how much are we off? When will I be told there IS growth? When will the “MRI’s not 100% accurate” show growth? Does that make sense?
I know I must accept the stable. And, don’t get me wrong – I do. But these dang brain tumors keep me up at night. Sometimes I can’t believe I have 2 brain tumors in my cerebellum. Why me? What did I do to cause this? Why do I have 2 tumors? Blah, blah, blah. Same story, different day.
So, I got up this morning and went to the gym. I try to combat the bad days with something good. Something different. Something outside my comfort zone. Putting stability into my life where I can.