new!

Check out the new custom t-shirt I just created!

Take a look at my entire store here.  What other items would you like to see?  I am doing all I can to be financially independent.  Please consider buying a shirt if you can.

Thanks for looking!

 

 

Wordless Wednesday 6/14/17

Wordless Wednesday 6/7/17

Daily Prompt: Imaginary

When I was little I didn’t have an imaginary friend.  I always wished I did, though.  Back then I always wondered, “Where do they meet their friend?” – HA.  To be a kid again and have that thought be the extent of my fears:  how to meet an imaginary friend.

Alas.  Today?  So much is different.

Where to even begin?  How can I separate my fears from imaginary ones?  Granted, getting diagnosed with 2 brain tumors was such a kick in the neck:  I will never have any fear worse than this come true.

Having some distance from 2011 though, I can’t say I do much of imagining anything anymore.

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Er. Not to sound like I am on the pity pot; it’s sad because it’s true.

 

Lost 

I’ve lost my way. And my hope. 

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I’m struggling but trying to find my way back. 

Wordless Wednesday 5/31/17

Alone 

Being alone is one thing. 

FEELING alone is something entirely different. I’m still broken about the judge’s decision. I have no hope. 

I sure wish my dad were here so he could give me a hug. 

(Kinda) Wordless Wednesday 5/24/17

I’m trying to avoid bankruptcy at all costs. Will you help please?

I created this teespring store to raise money for my living expenses plus to raise awareness for Cowden Syndrome and Lhermitte-duclos Disease.

Take a look at the new shirt I created just now!

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PS…if you know anyone that creates artwork or is willing to donate their time to help me create more shirts, please contact me!  Thanks!

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Click here!

Eff my life

I have a virtual friend who has offered me her expertise, advice, support, on this whole disability mess.  (THANK YOU!)

I chose not to read the judge’s 23 page denial because it will only make me angrier and more suicidal.

My virtual friend was kind enough to read the denial for me.

In part, the denial states that I was “fine and happy” in the courtroom.  (I was trying to be professional and not lose my marbles.  I almost did cause a scene at the end and I held it together because I was afraid THAT would be held against me.)

Over the years I have told my doctors that “I’m fine”.  The judge held that against me in part of his reason to deny me.

(I have only told my numerous doctors “I’m fine” because I AM TIRED OF TELLING THEM ABOUT MY PAIN ALL THE TIME.  MY CONSTANT HEAD PAIN, CONFUSION, MEMORY PROBLEMS, FINE MOTOR SKILLS PROBLEMS, ANXIETY, DEPRESSION, ETC.)  But, that doesn’t mean over the 6 years since my life got turned upside down I never told ANY doctor I am in horrific pain?  I DID!

The advocate told me if I chose to appeal then my case would go back to the same judge.  My virtual friend said that in the denial it says that it may not go back to the same judge.

So kids.  If you’re in the process of filing to disability, don’t EVER tell any of your doctors that you are fine.  And, don’t find someone to “help” you online.